New Year’s…oh, the wonder, the possibility…the allure of a “clean slate.” So much excitement and merriment, but then there’s the pressure. The pressure of procuring the perfect resolution. You know what I’m talking about. The hashtag worthy resolution. Something that will be impressive, ambitious, something others will want to emulate. Ugh! Sounds overwhelming. The funny thing is most of these expectations are self-imposed. Our pesky little inner critic nagging at us to do better, be better, and live our best lives.
We can make the decision to avoid this process altogether. Turn up our noses and decide not to enter into the oft quickly forgotten New Year’s resolution. Or maybe, we can lean in. Really own it and instead of resolving to create world peace, choose to make SMART goals (Small, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant and Time-measured). SMART goals are a Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) tool used to help make and meet goals. We use these in the therapeutic process, but SMART goals are helpful for personal and business goals as well.
A SMART New Year’s resolution can be under the umbrella of your values, ambitions and speak to the aspirational side of yourself. I personally have been guilty of making a New year’s resolution on December 31stand quickly abandoning it by mid-February. I have also fallen into the trap of avoiding making a resolution altogether.
This year, maybe instead of setting unrealistic goals, such as getting into peak, physical condition in 2020 <sigh> focus on the daily or weekly goals for nutrition and exercise. Maybe instead of vowing to meet your one true love this year <double sigh> resolve to make healthy relationship decisions (commit to engaging in social interactions and meeting new people). Maybe instead of resolving to not have any anxiety or intrusive thoughts in the new year, commit to engaging in treatment and following through on therapy and relapse prevention goals.
The point is to practice setting and keeping realistic goals and hopefully in the process practicing self-compassion and enjoying the journey.
Saharah Shrout, MA, LPC, is a Licensed Professional Counselor and owner of OCD & Anxiety Treatment of Houston. For more information, email saharah@oaththerapy.com or (281)665-0888.